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Monday, 15 September 2014

How You Can Benefit From Being Around Judgemental People

Hello, hi, how'd'you do? Okay, now we've made our introductions, let's do this shall we?

 
First thing to say is that although you can benefit from being around judgemental people, which I will explain as you read on, I don't recommend spending all of your time around them. Long-term readers of my blog might remember my theory of basement and balcony people - the general gist of it is, certain people will bring you down, but others will encourage you and put you in a higher light ("balcony" people). As a general note, avoid spending time with judgemental people as much as you can, but if you need to see these people every day, for example at work or school, here is how you can benefit and turn their negative energy into positive energy.

Spending time with a negative Nancy is hard, especially when said negative Nancy is judgemental as well. It leaves you feeling inadequate. And feeling inadequate is one of the worst feelings in the world. Believe me.

Recently someone made quite a rude remark about one of my ambitions to travel, meet people and  to explore as many countries as I can.  This person also, for lack of a better word, completely bashed my future plans and any ideas I happened to mention, which were not directed at this person in the first place. Now I didn't really care, mostly because I knew I was going to do it anyway. But it made me think about how this person, let's call her Nancy, said her opinion just for the sake of saying it. It didn't make me change my mind, it didn't make me like her even more - in fact probably the opposite of both happened.

But what I recommend, my dear readers, when dealing with someone like Nancy, is hearing these opinions. Not listening, hearing. Don't listen and let their hurtful words sink into your mind. Hear what they have to say, and as rude and as disrespectful as they are, just hear them out. The reason I say this is, it's important to remember their words and let that fuel your desire, almost as a form of motivation, to do what you want to do even more. If someone says don't do xyz because it's "so boring", you need to say to yourself, "WHO CARES? I know I'm going to do xyz anyway. I have the drive, the determination, the ambition and most importantly the dream, to get where I want to be in life. I can do it" Or even if it's something small like someone says something along the lines of  "I can't believe she's wearing that jumper, it's so hideous." Again, you need to say to yourself, "WHO CARES? Let me do me, and I'm going to be just fine."



You never have to prove anything to anyone. But you can show them how wrong they were about you. Let them see you doing what you said you would do. Let them see what they were never able to see in you before.

I am a whole hearted believer in things happening for a reason. I believe that when you meet difficult people who you have to deal with, that is your learning block. From these negative, unpleasant people you can learn how not to behave and how to treat others. You hear your kindergarten teacher say "treat others the way you want to be treated." Judgemental people don't treat you well. And it doesn't ever feel good. So why subject someone else to that same feeling? Learn from these people. Learn that treating people badly and looking down on their hopes, ambitions and dreams isn't what is right. What is right, is believing in yourself. Believing that you can get to where you want to be most. Learn from them that you need to believe in yourself even when they won't.

 photo JohnnyDeppquote_zpscae08da6.jpg

Judgemental people, although one of the worst to be around, have so many benefits. They teach you to love yourself even more, because they don't feel comfortable loving you. They teach you to believe in yourself and have your own dreams and goals, specific to you and no one else. They teach you to be independent and show you how you should make other people feel. They show you that even though you can feel your worst when around them, nothing is worse that bringing other people down. They teach you that you are the most important person in your life. You need to treat yourself with love, integrity and respect. Do what you want.


 
♥ Jess ♥
 
Useful links:

Saturday, 28 June 2014

What Does YOLO Mean To You?


This video isn't really related to the post, it just has the same title and I love the Lonely Island - it's just here to brighten up your day :) 

Yo yo yo blog readers! Welcome back to Eccentriclightbulbs, hope you've missed me - I've certainly missed you. For those of you who have had exams, I sincerely hope they all went well and for those of you who are getting results in the summer (like me) I'll be praying for the best for all of us! So enough with hellos and how do you dos, let's get cracking...

Today's post is all about doing things right here, right now. You may have heard this saying in other various forms like 'Carpe Diem' or 'seize the day'. But like oh so many phrases that we use, they seem to have lost their meaning (to me at least, I'm not sure about you.) We say YOLO but what does it actually mean? Okay, you only live once. Fair enough. But does it mean; trying an activity once eg. skydiving because you need to take a chance, because you only live once and you should seize every chance you could get? Or not doing an activity eg.skydiving because you could essentially die hence the 'only live once' part?

 
 
Think about what YOLO means to you. Why not think of it when it means doing every opportunity you can get? It's scary thinking that you could take a chance and fail. It's kind of a secret nightmare of mine. But what if, just what if; what if you don't fail and it goes well and you succeed? Don't you want that?
 
 
Take the chance and say YOLO! Work towards what you want. To be able to take the chance you need to start doing things right here, right now because you only live once, and you need to use every second and opportunity you have on this planet to be who you want to be. And to do that, you need to start doing things right now.

Want to be a dancer? Start taking classes today or stretch right now.
Want to get into Oxbridge? Start going to University open days, start writing your CV today.
Want to lose weight? Start exercising now.
Want to play the ukulele? Buy one/ rent one today.
Want to be an author? Start practicing your writing now.

Do all the things you've always wanted to do like joining a Pilates class or reading that book by Jodi Picoult or watching that PLL marathon because you never got the chance. Well now, here is your chance. Do it now because life is too important to waste time procrastinating and waiting around. Do it for yourself so you can live your life to how you want it to be.

It's summer now, the perfect time to start working on things you've always wanted to do. Today, YOU reading this sentence  at this exact moment, this exact second, I want you to say, "YOLO." Say it, then laugh a little because it sounds ridiculous,  then work towards whatever you said YOLO to. If you said it to being a singer, get singing lessons once you're done reading this post. If you said YOLO to being more toned, go to a gym now. If you said YOLO to skydiving, great, jump off out of that plane (with a parachute though).

 


Take this moment and this summer to get your chance. Don't wait for something to occur. Make it happen now by doing what you've always wanted to do. So, my dear readers, take a chance and say YOLO.

♥ Jess ♥
 
 

Tuesday, 8 April 2014

Update + Exams

Why, hello there :) Hope you've all been well and you're doing great whatever it is you do. I'll start this off by saying a huge I'M SORRY for being a bit absent. (A bit is a bit of an understatement though) Life got crazy, stuff happened, I lost my way, I'm trying to go back, travelled far and wide using my own magical purple backpack called "Backpack" (yes, I'm Dora - surprise!) and met a lovely monkey who wears red boots who just so happens to be called "Boots." And he pulls red boots off just as much as Ted Mosby does. You go Glen Coco.


So to the four of you who are subscribed to me/read my blog/look at my blog/say you read it but really don't, I apologise for not showing up here. Like I've mentioned oodles and oodles of times, I need to get focused for my GCSEs and as much as I LOVE my blog, for now school work has to come first. But then after GCSEs I can say "Screw you!" to school for the summer. Yipee!! Just gotta keep pushing through...just keep going....just keep swimming...just keep swimming....

Sorry, let's get back on track. I say "let's" as if you're off-track too but really it's just me. Oops. Okay so main thing I needed to say today was:

1) Sorry for being gone :(
2) I'm going to be gone for a little while more :( (Until about June 20th)
3) GCSEs start in approximately 5 weeks and that is how long I have to get my shit together. Of course I will be drawing up ideas if I can to let you know how I get on (if you care about that), but I won't be able to properly write blog posts and unfortunately, I can't let myself get distracted.
4) I apologise again for the future but stay tuned for TONS of posts in the summer!
5) Wish me luck! I've been building up to these exams for about 5 years and I need to not fall at the last hurdle. I'm nervous....oh Lord please watch over me! <3 p="">
*deep exhale*
Alright, let's do this.
 
Side note: If you're going to be doing your GCSEs/any other summer exams, I've compiled a little 'playlist' of blog posts you might find helpful - Good luck!
 
 
♥ Jess ♥
 
 
 

 

Thursday, 6 March 2014

How To: Not Let Others Affect You


Nowadays, people spend far too much time wondering, "I think he/she hates me" or "Everyone's going to think I'm a loser" or something along those lines, and for what? It's perfectly natural to want to be liked and to want to be appreciated and respected by our peers, but sometimes if someone doesn't like you (which I hope isn't the case for all you lovely readers) it can be difficult to not let it affect you. From personal experience, I know what it's like to be controlled and to do everything according to other people and what they think is right. And somehow, thank the Lord, I managed to get myself out of that rut. So today, we're going to talk about the solution to this problem.

The first thing to realise is that not everyone can like you. Only when you've accepted this can you move on to the next stage of not letting everyone affect you (a bit like a healing process). You need to learn to accept that even though these people don't like you, they're just like you in the sense that you also dislike some things. That doesn't make you or them a bad person, it just means that you all like different things. The other thing to remember, is that just like with your friends, you need to be accepting of their own thoughts and opinions whether you agree with them or not. Remember that even if you absolutely hate each other, you need to be the bigger person and rise above this petty-ness. You need to be able to say that "X, Y and Z hates me and I'm okay with that."


Even if you don't see this person who doesn't like you, if you keep thinking about them and their hatred: STOP. The more you think about them, the more you'll fixate on that negative energy, thus causing you to take on a negative and sad mind-set. Don't let them win by letting them affect you and letting them take up space in that wonderful head of yours. How dare they even try to make you weaker? And how pathetic is it that they find joy in making others feel smaller? The way to stop thinking about them, is to distract yourself. Do it in the form of exercise, homework, talk to a friend etc. whatever it is, distract yourself.

 
Remember that even if he/she hates you, the proportion of people who love you and treasure you is a lot greater than people who don't like you, whether you realise it or not. Instead of letting their negative energy get you down, channel it into positive energy and invest that into spending time with the friends and family who do treasure and appreciate you. At the end of the day, they will be the ones who stuck by you and were there for you when you needed them. Be thankful for the love that you do have, instead of the one you don't.


When it comes to having to see this person on a daily basis, this can be the most difficult thing to do. The ideal way in dealing with these people is to avoid them. The minute they start becoming negative or start nit-picking your little flaws or whatever it is terrible people like that do, walk away. Defend yourself if you need to, but the best thing to do is to avoid it. Walking away doesn't make you weak, it just means you're wise enough to walk away from nonsense around you. Walking away doesn't mean you don't have a backbone, it just means you've chosen to rise above it all. And walking away doesn't mean you don't care, it only means you love yourself enough to not let others affect you. And loving yourself, is one of the most important things you can do.


When you truly love yourself, you can gain so much more out of life. Learning to love who you are gives you confidence and the belief that you really can do anything you please. At the end of the day, this is your life, not theirs, so don't let them control it. Sure they might give you dirty looks and glares for not following what they believe to be right, but who cares? They have absolutely no power over you and other people will see this confidence you have and respect you for it.


So who cares if a few moody and mopey people don't like what you do? It's your life and you should do what you want. Not what other people want. But what you want.

I've always loved this quote:


Well done Mr Cheadle, you have captured the essence of life perfectly. And it's true. Be someone who loves themselves to such an extent that you're not sorry at all for who you are. This is you and you are brilliant. Don't apologise for what you think, what you believe and most importantly, who you are. Be this person Don Cheadle is talking about and you will be happy.


Remember: Confidence and fearlessness is sexy. Whatever shape or size or race or gender you are, the one thing that will always be sexy is confidence. And I don't mean sexy in appearance or in a provocative way, I mean sexy in an empowering and inspiring way. How we see ourselves, affects how others see us in turn. At the end of the day we are all beautiful, strong, sexy people. Confidence = happiness. And as Ms Hepburn taught us;

 
So be you, love yourself, have confidence in who you are and remember that this is your life to live and no one else's. Be strong and be unapologetically who you are. You are all beautiful and you are all loved. I hope you enjoy the rest of your day and you now have the confidence and self-love to not let others affect you. Take care my lovely readers!
 
♥ Jess ♥
 
 
 


Monday, 17 February 2014

A Step In The Right Direction

Recently, I went through a bit of a "mid-life" crisis. The crisis was that I didn't know what I wanted to do as a career or even what I was going to do with my life. No warning, just*BAM* complete freak-out. I suddenly thought to myself, "Is this path, that I was going to take, really what I want to do with my life? Do I want to go down this route?" And I knew deep down that the answer was "no."

Now a few of you may be holding confused expressions on your face and going "Why are you calling that a crisis? You still have so much time left to decide all of this!" And yeah, that's true. But the thing that freaked me out so much was that I was always one of the people who had a plan and something to work towards. I always had a rough outline of what job I wanted to have, where I wanted to live and how my life would pan out, that it terrified me to be so...un-prepared? Confused? I don't even know.

So now I'm stuck in the position of what the hell am I going to do with my life? Let me tell you one thing, it's difficult when you have a problem and you try to give yourself advice. Somehow it doesn't really have much of an effect. But nonetheless, I made myself calm down, meditated for a few minutes and I did this:

I wrote down the things that I loved.

Not so much materialistic things like ice-cream, new notebooks or How I Met Your Mother, but things like what I enjoyed doing and seeing in the world. It was things like;
Seeing people smile
Making people laugh
Spreading joy
Making people feel better/Being the sunshine to others
Writing
Looking and studying beautiful things I come across
Learning about new things
Being Creative
Talking to people
Inspiration/Inspiring Others + Helping others
etc, etc....
 
Side note: While I was writing the list, I really wanted to put a smiley face next to everything! Haha
 
When you know what you love, it helps you focus on it and how happy it makes you. Because when you love something, you'll automatically fight for it and want to keep it in your life, whether you realise or not.

Doing this, first of all really helped me with appreciating all that I had and treasured. But it also helped me get back on track and find a guide to what I wanted to do. It's not quite a yellow brick road, but more of an arrow that says "THIS WAY". All I know is, it's a step in the right direction.

 
In life, I believe that all of our actions, no matter how small, will lead to something bigger at the end of it. Like a staircase. Each step might not make a whole lot of difference, but at the end after you've taken 20 steps, it makes a huge difference on where you are/how high up you are.


One of my favourite teachers said to me the other day (this is roughly what he said - I can't remember it exactly);
 
"When you improve by 1% each time, eventually it all adds up to something greater."
 
To put it into a little bit of perspective, think of it in terms of physical appearance for now.
  • Pulling your hair into a ponytail - 1%
  • Plucking that stray eyebrow hair - 1%
  • Moisturizing cracked lips- 1%
  • Tucking in your shirt - 1%
  • Pulling up your tights - 1%
  • Smiling - 1% (to be honest, it's more like 20% but I'm trying to make a point)
  • Fixing your smudged eyeliner - 1%
Those 7 things individually, only improved yourself by 1% each time. But together, added up to something greater and now you're 7% better than you were before. You're 7% better presented, 7% more attractive and 7% more confident. (After all, confidence can be greatly affected by how you present yourself.) Now when you apply what my teacher told me to life, it makes sense too. We can all take steps to improve ourselves or move forward by 1%. It may not seem like much at all - in fact it hardly seems like anything. But after a while that 1% will lead to 5%, then 20%, then 50%, then 75% and then, hopefully, 100%.

 
It might take a while for it all to add up, but you need to have a little bit of patience. Remember that there's a reason people say, "All good things come to those who wait."  Even if it takes you a while to even get that 1%, don't worry - life has a funny way of working itself out.
 
But let me help you with your first 1% of your life. Create this list to help guide you of where you want to be and where you think you belong. It may not solve your whole life, but it's a step in the right direction.
 
♥ Jess ♥
 

Sunday, 9 February 2014

How To: Love Yourself

Whenever I think of February, I think of love. Possibly because the only major "holiday" is Valentine's Day but February just reminds me of hearts and flowers and chocolates and pink and red and candy and ,most importantly, LOVE!

 
First of all, I'd just like to point out that when I say "love yourself" I don't mean in that way you cheeky minxes, although you can if you want to.

I think in life, it's so important to learn how to love yourself before you can love others. It's not selfish nor is it shallow in any way, shape or form. To be able to truly love someone and be in a relationship with them (whether it's romantic or not) you need to be able to love who you are so that you can love them as openly and as honestly as possible. That way, you'll be able to build a stronger relationship with this person and will benefit you in the long run.   

So how do we learn to love ourselves?

One of the most important things to do first is to let go of your past and to forgive yourself for your mistakes.   I personally have done some things that I haven't exactly been proud of (like maybe talking about someone behind their back, arguing with friends/family or nit-picking all the little things about someone etc.) and they haven't exactly been the highlights of my life.

But these things are in the past and I can't do anything about it - until time travel has been invented. So I need to now accept the fact that I've made these mistakes and I'm going to forgive myself for them. I'm only human and making mistakes is just a part of life (also I was quite young and immature back then). The most important thing is that you learn from them and you grow as a person. I also think that it's important to be honest with yourself when admitting your mistakes - it's only you who's going to know them so no one's going to judge you.

 
Following on from that, don't be afraid that people will judge you.  I know this one is difficult especially with our changing society and whatnot, but one of the things that holds us back in life from being truly happy and caring for ourselves is the pressure to be like the rest of them. Don't think "Oh I have to make myself unique" because there's only one you and that in itself makes you unique already! It's a struggle not to conform to the rest of the world and what they do and what they don't, but sometimes what "they're" doing, won't make you happy. Remember that it's not always possible for everyone to like you. So you need to learn to accept that you like and enjoy doing different things from everyone else. Also what's important to accept is who you are which leads me onto my next point.

 
Beauty is a slightly difficult topic to talk about because it's a little controversial but to love yourself, accept and appreciate your own beauty.  I don't just mean if you have nice eyes and a cute nose, but the beauty that is inside you. That applies to two things:

1) Your working body and the functioning limbs you have been blessed with and
2) Your positive thoughts and feelings.

To accept this, think about yourself and try to think beyond your outside appearance. Think about all those times you encouraged everyone to give it a go or those times you just gave hugs to people because they were having a bad day or all the moments you were able to help people get back up again and try. Think about all the positivity you try to spread to people. That is your inner beauty and treasure that in the hopes that it will never fade.


 Every now and again, no matter how independent you are, you just need a friend and someone who will make this world seem not so lonely. And to love yourself, be that person to someone else and go  spread some friendliness. By spreading this, you'll make them feel better and in turn you'll feel better for making them happier and hopefully they'll pass on this feeling to someone else. In an interview with Pastor Matthew Barnett (link here) he said a quote which really made me think about how our actions can affect others. And he said:

"Look for the kid who feels forsaken or unloved and be a friend to them."

 
When you were younger, you probably heard the phrase "Treat others the way you want to be treated" a thousand and one times but this is completely true. When you treat others in a way that makes them feel special and cared for, they will return the favour to you. I know this with some of my friends who have given me the most heartfelt gifts and letters and in return, to reciprocate this love, I will do the same for them. Not because I feel obligated to return the gesture, but I want them to feel as elated and as loved as they made me feel.

Remember: friendship costs nothing. It's worth more than words can express but there's no price on friendship.

The other thing to remember when learning to love yourself, is to do things that you love. I'll be touching on this in more detail in another post later this month, but spend time with things you like. Whether that's watching TV or going for walks or talking with your best friend or listening to music, whatever it is, do it and you'll feel a lot happier and a lot more content with yourself.

 
 
An obvious one to remember, but I'll just slip in here, is to take care of your body. This doesn't have to be working out for 5 hours every other day or anything crazy, but simple things like getting more sleep, getting some fresh air each day, eating right, drinking water, stretching in the mornings - it's important to take care of the body you've been given.

The final method of loving yourself that I will share today, is to not compare yourself to other people. Everyone is different and everyone does things differently. People show love, dedication, hard work, success, friendship in various ways and you shouldn't compare yourself own ways to theirs. The only person you should compare yourself to, is the person you were yesterday. (I feel like that's a Tumblr quote waiting to happen.)




You know yourself better than anyone and only you will know how to improve and be the best version of you.
 

♥ Jess ♥


Monday, 3 February 2014

Birthdays

 

Hiya everyone! A bit of a shorter post today as duty calls (ie. my homework) but just wanted to write a quick post about birthdays :)

So as you might be able to guess, today, February 3rd, is my birthday! Yes thank you, hold the applause. Now normally when it comes to this day, for many people the main focus of the day is getting tons and tons of presents and getting to boss people around using the excuse "It's MY birthday." And of course, I did do this but when I woke up this morning, the first thing I thought of was how lucky I am and how blessed I am to have such wonderful people around me and to have so many people that care about me. I also thought about how lucky I am to have experienced the things I have done. It's weird to think how much I've done in all the years that I've been alive. (Not showing off in anyway, I promise.) That being said, I just really wanted to share my love with you all as I've been in a very affectionate mood all day.

Firstly, I don't know if I can say this enough but to the few readers who do read my blog, THANK YOU. It means a hella lot to me and I really love all the kind words people have left me. (And "hi" to some new readers!)

Also a personal thank you to all those who have been so kind to give me such wonderful gifts and how much I appreciate the sentiment. (I actually cried tears of happiness today - oops.) So if it's your birthday soon:

1) Happy Birthday you wonderful human being.
2) Think about how blessed you are to have the things you have and the people who love you (It will put you in an amazing mood for the rest of the day.)
3) I really do hope you have the best day you could possibly have. You deserve happiness on the day that is completely and undeniably your own. ♥
 
♥ Jess ♥

Friday, 31 January 2014

January Roundup: Make The Most Of 2014


When I think of 2014 as a whole I get a little nervous and excited. I haven't quite decided if it's the 'good' kind of anxiousness yet, but all I know is, when I think about the whole year to come my heart starts to beat a little faster. Oooh just writing that has made my heart do a little jump and has just made me breathe out, "oh gosshhh".

Now I'm no psychiatrist or doctor or counsellor, but I suspect the reason why I feel this way is because I'm thinking of 2014 as one big chunk and some kind of ginormous task that's bigger than the UK. Which naturally, makes me want to crawl into a corner and sing to myself and hibernate for at least another 3 months.  The real reason why people can't seem to move towards their goals is because they focus on their task as this unfamiliar, colossal goal and it puts them in the terrified-let's-just-avoid-all-problems-and-not-do-anything mind set.

So how do you solve this? Easy. Work in small steps. Focus on one section per day and avoid just doing it all in one chunk. You can't become selfless or a genius in one day, but you can take baby steps every day to help you get there. Also, everything is a lot less daunting and more achievable in smaller bits. I get that we can't all have the time or the energy to work on ourselves everyday, but think about how many days you will waste in one month by not moving forward and waiting until the weekend to even start. Again, I'm not saying that tomorrow you have to have achieved all your goals, but to get to that  A* or to be 5 pounds lighter, things need to be taken in smaller steps.

 
 
So this is what I want you to do with the goals you made: find that piece of paper that's a) either taped up to your door and hanging proudly or b) crumpled up and pretty dirty in places, and break up your goals into smaller chunks that you can do daily.  To explain this a little further, let's use my own goals as an example. For each one, I will find something I can do for a few minutes each day in order to move forward with them, which I want you to interpret to fit your own goals. A lot of these things that you'll see below I either already do and some I'm planning to start soon.
(To see a full list of my resolutions and reasons behind them + further details on them: click here )

  • Take My Blog Places. - Each day, I'll jot down any ideas that spring to mind and plan out future blog posts as well as images I might use. It doesn't take very long, a few seconds at a time really. If I see something nice or I think of a good idea, I'll write it down in order to move forward. And on the weekends, when I have a bit more freedom, I'll do more research by reading other people's blogs and promoting my page.

    (Side note: Eccentric Light Bulbs now has a Facebook page! Be sure to "like" it and share it if you want - it would mean a lot to me :))

  • Exercise When I Can. - Each night, I'll exercise for the length of ONE song. Nothing too strenuous; some push-ups and crunches work well for me. In addition to this, you can also do some exercises throughout the day like while cleaning your face, while you're in the shower etc. For me, I like doing calf raises while I'm brushing my teeth and stretching while I wash my face. (Although I do look really weird while I'm doing it.)

  • Take Better Care Of My Body. - Everyday, when I first wake up, I'll take a long drink of water and at the end of the day before I turn out the light, I'll take another. (Obviously I'll still drink water throughout the day as well.) I'm also going to try and add in a few more minutes of sleep by developing a faster morning routine and staying more organised so I can get all the beauty sleep I need. At the moment, I'm trying to incorporate more vegetables into my diet and something as simple as taking one extra carrot at dinner time can really help quicken the process.

  • Take More Risks. - For me, I'm going to do one thing a day that scares me (within reason). Whether it's talking to a classmate that I don't know very well or putting up my hand even if I'm unsure if I have the right answer (that really terrifies me), I'll do it and take a risk. Because you never know if you're right unless you try.

(Side note: This is one of my favourite HIMYM quotes) 

  • Get More Organised. - Each morning and each night, I'm going to go through the lists of things that I need to do and get my head focused on the tasks at hand. I've also been keeping a little list book which really helps me prioritize my assignments better.

  • Promise Myself to Try. - This one is a little difficult to do, but everyday, I will try to remind myself of who I am/want to be and where I want to end up. I know that every journey starts with the decision to try so by constantly reminding myself of what I could be and have, hopefully I'll be able to try each day. (For any motivation tips: click here or here )
  • Not Let Things Get Me Down So Easily/Be Stronger. - Every time something goes right or something makes me happy, I'm going to write it down no matter how small it is. Like today, for example, one of my favourite songs came on the radio, my teacher gave me a really nice compliment and I managed to sort out the theme of my art project. And when I get sad, I'll go back to my list and read through it so I can remember my happiness and hopefully catch some of that joy whilst reading it.

  • Live and Take Charge. - Each day you will be faced with daily struggles of conformity whether you realise it or not. Even something like choosing what you want for lunch can be affected by what other people say. So to really live and take charge, I will try and remind myself each day that if I want to do it, I should just do it. If I want to bring a pickle sandwich to school while everyone else eats an egg & cress one, I will. This one probably will take the longest time to achieve, but the way to get there is in small daily steps.


  • Get 10 A*s in my GCSEs - This one isn't actually in my resolutions, but I thought I would add this for anyone who does have something like this for their resolutions and I think it is important to still focus on your exams. (Also this might seem a bit ambitious, but it's important to aim high and stretch yourself to your full potential. Don't set your goals low just because you think you can't do it.) So, instead of waiting for the GCSE time to roll around to start revising, I'm going to start now. So each day I'll take 5 minutes to learn some German vocab, 2 minutes to read through my English notes, 2 minutes to draw up that Chemistry diagram etc. Those three things took less than 10 minutes and already I would have become one step closer to getting that A*.

 
Even if you haven't been completely successful in moving towards your goals this January, that's okay. February is a new month and a new start. And if you fail again, tomorrow is another new start. The point is that it's okay if you don't succeed at first. What's that saying? If at first you don't succeed, try and try again. Get back up again and believe that you can get to where you need to be. Because at the end of the day, the only person you should never give up on, is yourself.

And even better, the end of January (the 31st) is actually Chinese New Year! So even if you aren't Chinese, take this as a new start to your year.

So that concludes January 2014 - hope you enjoyed this month with me (even if I was absent from it for a little while. But on the bright side, my mocks went really well!)

Hopefully, I'll see you all again in February which is going to be a very exciting month I think. I've already got tons and tons of posts planned and February is one of my favourite months of the year, so stay tuned! Take Chinese New Year or the beginning of February as your new start to the year and make the most of 2014. We'll get there together. You deserve it.


Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Get Motivated: Study Tips & Tricks

Hoorah! I'm back! Seems a long time - almost a month actually! Apologies in advance if this post won't be quite up to my normal standard. I'm a bit out of touch firstly with people in general as my mind has been focused on work and physics equations, English quotes, verb tenses etc, etc...and secondly, I haven't actually typed anything apart from my username and passwords in the two weeks I've been gone. Oops.

But I've missed you blog, oh wonderful glorious blog. And studying wasn't exactly a walk in the park. I mean we all know how it is; you've got tons of work to do and you just can't get up and do any of it. You just sit at your desk reading the same thing over and over again. Before you know it, it's 1 am and you still haven't got anything inside that gloop that you call a brain. Sure the adrenaline could fuel you until you have to actually leave the house for school. But you did have those 5 days earlier where you did nothing but sit in front of the TV, laptop on your stomach to keep you warm, unwashed face, greasy hair and the faint smell of a takeaway lingering in the air. Sound familiar?


Although I am pretty awesome, (If I do say so myself) I can't turn back time to 5 days ago when you had time to actually study. But what I can do is offer you some kind of help, advice and dandy (?) little tips and tricks to you and the rest of the internet. :)
 
1. Spend Time With Positive People - I've stressed the importance of spending time with positive people before, but this is especially important around exam time. Don't have a 'Negative Nancy' whinging about how she hasn't studied and how she's going to do so badly and how the teacher didn't teach her anything in the first place. Instead replace 'Negative Nancy' with a 'Positive Polly' (not sure if I like this name or not, but just roll with it) - someone who will cheer you on and reassure you of the fact that you'll do great because you worked hard and you're awesome.
 
2. Avoid ALL Drama - I'm sure you all have those friends that no matter what, drama just seems to circulate them wherever they go. If you're someone like me who gets distracted easily, it's best to avoid drama. I'm not saying ditch your friend, but if any of this craziness comes up, calmly say, "I'm sorry you have this issue (again *eye-roll*) but I would suggest you talk about this with someone else as I would like to concentrate on this work at hand. After I have finished, I would be happy to talk about your problem(s)." Any exams I did before, would have gone a lot smoother if I had avoided drama.

 
3. Imagine The Future - I'm all for living in the present and working towards your goals, but sometimes thinking about the future can help a lot. Think how this part is just a step towards your goal. The future seems like such a long way away, so think about whatever job you have as being something that you'll get next week or next month and how the test is just something you have to pass to get to this goal of yours.
 
4. You will be the future version of yourself - Slightly similar to the tip above, but remember that   in 24 hours you will be the future version of you and you will have done the exam. I don't know why, but thinking about that seems to motivate myself and make me think, "I want to be the future version of myself who has finished the exam and knows that it went well."
 
(Side note: This is actually how I dance. Not kidding.)
 
5. Flashcards and Headphones - This one might not be for everyone but I have found flashcards so, so useful. I'd never actually tried them out until a few weeks ago but when I finally did everything just seemed so much clearer. They're perfect for revising in a car, on a bus and right before the test. It also helps summarise the main points that you really need to pay attention to.
Headphones/Earphones might not be for everyone, but they are really good if you have to study in a crowded place, to just block all the annoying chattering out. Again, this isn't for everyone, but it is sometimes useful in noisy areas.
 
6. Vlog - This is by far one of my weirdest tips but from my obsession with Youtube, I think it's clear why I say this. Okay I don't mean actually record yourself with a camera (unless you want to) but just pretend like you're in a vlog. I highly, highly recommend this as a good way to getting stuff done. Also it's really fun pretending you're a Youtuber and just saying, "Okay guys, well I'm going to work now and I'll check in with you in a little bit after I've finished!"
 
 
7. Make a Rewards List - For some reason when it comes to exams, I seem to want to do absolutely everything NOT related to them. Something just takes a hold of me and whispers, "Go on, watch New Girl now."  But I'm saying now: save it. Make a list of every kind of non-academic thing you want to do and save it until your work is done. 1) It builds suspense until you actually do it 2) It makes it so much more worth it when you have actually done your work 3) You can then have movie marathons/go shopping/whatever you want to do, without thinking about the piles of crap you have to get done.
 
8. Get Organised - Tidy your room, buy revision guides, make lists, sharpen your pencils, clean your desk, do whatever you need to do to get organised.
 
 
9. Do What Works For You - I have a few friends that all have different revision schedules; some do hour long study sessions of a certain subject and plan their day to the hour of everything they do while others just go with the flow. And I have tried scheduling before, but I hated it. It just doesn't work for me. So if you need to create a schedule, create one that will work for you, whether that is planning everything on the hour to the hour or just saying to yourself "I need to get X, Y and Z done by the end of the day."
 
10. Different Learners - Unfortunately there's no easy way to determine what kind of learner you are but people have different tactics to learning things. You can take a few tests on the internet, but ultimately the only way to find out the best way for you to learn is to experiment. A lot of people learn by writing things out again and again, but for me I don't find that works at all in certain subjects like Physics. However, I do write things out again and again when it comes to learning my German and French Orals. So experiment and see what works for you.
 
11. Time VS Learning - Remember that it's not about how long you study for, but about how well you study. If you're the kind of person who studies for days and days - great! Snaps for your motivation and hard work! But if you can't do that, don't force yourself to study for that long just because someone else is doing it. Because if you only stare at that book for all those hours - how much would you really have taken in?
 
 
12. You Deserve It - Think about all the people who never understood why you went to the library to study or didn't understand that you needed to work on your Geography or believed that you couldn't do well or gave you dirty looks for spending your lunchtime with your French homework rather than them or called you a nerd or a dork or a neek. Think about how much that hurt you. And channel those emotions into your drive to do well and prove that you can and you will do well. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, but make it clear and let them all know: you were wrong about me.  
 
So I hope that helped you if you have any exams coming up or that just entertained you for 5 minutes. I really hope you'll all be able to pull out one or two tips from this post so that you can turn this:
 
 
into this:

(Another actual representation of my dancing abilities)
 
Side note: I'm a little bit obsessed with New Girl/GIFs
 
♥ Jess ♥

Monday, 6 January 2014

Reflecting on 2013

Hello again my lovely light bulbs :) Hoping all of you are feeling fresh, motivated and excited to tackle the rest of the year. Just wanted to let you all know that I might be absent from this blog until the end of January. Might, being the key word here. And I know that sounds like forever, but I promise it won't be!

Why are you leaving? I hear you ask. Simple answer: school. More importantly, exams. This year is quite an important year for me, although quite is a bit of an understatement, so it's really important I focus on my work. The way to focus for me personally, is to limit my distractions and concentrate only my work. So my blog will be on a bit of a hiatus for January. But of course, I will have tons and tons of new posts lined up afterwards!

While I'm away though, feel free to have a wander round, comment, like, share, tell your friends, subscribe - anything! (All blog posts can be found on the right side of the screen. And just below that, where it says followers and there's a blue button that says "Join this site", if you have a Google account, feel free to subscribe!)

Round-up of 2013:

The past year was pretty busy. I started this blog, I made it though school, I made it past bad friends and bad relationships and I made new friends (who I am very, very grateful for.) Starting this blog was one of the most rewarding things I have ever done. It built my confidence, let me become myself again and most importantly, allowed me to inspire and help other people. I am very grateful to my blog and the people who read it.
I did a lot in the last year and the first part of it wasn't great but as time progressed, I changed, I became a stronger person and I'm proud of my journey in 2013.

Phew. That's enough rambling for now.

I thought I would round up some of my favourite posts. (If any of you are interested for any reasons.) Talk to you all soon and wish me luck on my work!

 
- Technically not a post of 2013, but still felt like this should be one to look at. (oops, advertising myself there...)
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

So here's to making 2014 the best year yet! Stay beautiful, stay true to you and be happy. And remember:

 
♥ Jess ♥

Saturday, 4 January 2014

Things to Keep in Mind

Just a few things to focus on today, to remind yourself of tomorrow, to revisit in the future and to guide you always.
 


 
 
 
 



 



 
 
♥ Jess ♥